8 Secrets You Should Keep to Yourself: What Not to Tell Your Girlfriend

You're an honest, open man who wants to be sincere in a relationship. But let's be realistic: the truth doesn’t always make life better, especially if you blurt it out without a filter.

You're an honest, open man who wants to be sincere in a relationship. But let's be realistic: the truth doesn’t always make life better, especially if you blurt it out without a filter. There are things your girlfriend doesn’t need to know—not because you want to deceive her, but because keeping quiet will save you both from unnecessary conflicts. So, bite your tongue when it comes to these topics.

Past Flings and Old Crushes

Even if your girlfriend acts like an open-minded and understanding person, she doesn’t need to know how many women you’ve been with. First, because it’s unpleasant for her. Second, because her imagination will turn every one of your exes into a rival. So forget about stories that start with, “Oh, back when I was with Lisa…” The fewer details, the stronger your relationship.

Details About Your Family Life

Whether your family is perfect or a total mess, you don’t need to share all the details. She doesn’t have to know that your uncle married the same woman three times or that your brother’s mother-in-law puts sugar in dumplings. That will only create unnecessary biases and tension. Let her form her own opinion about your relatives.

Small Financial Details

Yes, honesty about money is important. But that doesn’t mean your girlfriend needs to know exactly how much you spent at the bar with your friends or that you got a little too invested in cryptocurrency this month. She just needs to feel confident that you can handle your finances—without a detailed report on every dollar.

Your Fears (If They Don’t Affect Her)

We all have fears, but if yours don’t directly impact your relationship, it’s best to keep them to yourself. If you’re afraid of spiders, no big deal. But if you suddenly confess that the idea of marriage or kids terrifies you, get ready for problems. Sometimes, it’s better to keep things to yourself—especially if you haven’t figured them out yet.

Your Opinion About Her Friends

If you don’t like her friend Katie because she always acts like a know-it-all, keep it to yourself. Women don’t like it when their friends are criticized. If you openly trash-talk her social circle, she’ll likely just get upset. The only exception is if someone is genuinely interfering in your relationship—but in that case, you’ll need solid arguments, not just emotions.

Your Ex and Her Influence on Your Life

The topic of exes is a ticking time bomb. Never say how amazing your ex’s cooking was or how much fun you had together. Any detail in this conversation will make your girlfriend think you’re comparing her to your ex. If talking about your past relationship is unavoidable, keep it brief and emotionless. And never say, “My ex had the same hair as you”—that’s a direct road to an argument.

Embarrassing Moments from Your Life

Telling funny stories is great. But if the story is something like, “I got drunk at an office party and passed out in a storage closet,” it’s better left for your friends. Your girlfriend should see you as someone she can rely on, not as a guy who collects embarrassing failures.

Your True Feelings About Her Gifts

Even if she gives you an ugly sweater you’ll never wear, smile and say “thank you.” If you don’t like it, wear it once a year and pretend it’s warm and cozy. Women care more about your reaction than the gift itself. If you want a better present next time, subtly hint at what you like—but never say her choice was a total failure.