There’s a particular type of man. He seems to have it all: charisma, intelligence, confidence. But after five minutes of conversation, you feel your brain slowly shutting down.
Not because the topic is difficult, but because the person turns the conversation into a lecture about themselves.
And there you are, standing with an empty glass, nodding automatically, mentally planning your escape.
«I», «me», «my» — the triple dose of boredom
There’s a universal way to become instantly boring: constantly talk about yourself.
Work, hobbies, successes, failures, ex, new partner, fitness, investments, dog, back to work.
Even if you’re an interesting guy, this stream of “me-me-me” is like white noise.
The problem isn’t the topic—it’s that you leave no room for the other person.
Listening is a form of respect.
Talking non-stop is a form of violence.
Why it annoys everyone
When someone only talks about themselves, they send a clear signal:
«You don’t interest me. I’m the main character, and you’re the extra».
And that’s exactly when any sympathy dies.
Women lose interest, colleagues look for an excuse to leave, friends start “forgetting” to reply in the chat.
This is not an exaggeration. Psychologists at the European Institute of Positive Psychology say:
the ability to listen is not a bonus—it’s the key to social success.
It affects relationships, career, and how others perceive you.
Diagnosis: low emotional intelligence
Psychologist Travis Bradberry (author of the bestseller *Emotional Intelligence 2.0*) says:
«People with high EQ ask questions and listen.
Those who only talk about themselves simply don’t feel others».
In other words, it’s not just boredom.
It’s a sign that you don’t see anyone but yourself.
And while you admire your own reflection, others are already drawing conclusions.
Two more warning signs
The eternal complainer.
Every conversation turns into a book of complaints. Everything is bad: the weather, work, people, life.
The problem isn’t that you feel bad—it’s that you’re stuck in that state.
“And me…”
Someone shares a story, and you can’t resist:
— Well, I had…
— I actually just recently…
— And I in general…
Congratulations. You just buried the dialogue.
How Not to Be Boring: A Quick Checklist
Ask about your conversation partner—and really listen.
Respond to emotions, not just words.
Don’t rush to insert your own story.
Remember: a good conversation is like tennis, not an interrogation.
