I recently had a small realization about voice messages. There are people who genuinely dislike them. And no — it’s not arrogance, not emotional distance, and certainly not a lack of social skills. The reason is much simpler. And surprisingly, it comes down to logic and numbers.
A Bit of Math That Explains Almost Everything
When we read, our brain processes around 300–400 words per minute. That’s a natural speed for visual perception. When we listen, the average drops to about 120 words per minute.
In other words, the brain is forced to slow down nearly three times. Imagine driving a high-performance car through heavy city traffic. Technically, you’re moving — but internally, tension builds. That’s why voice messages don’t irritate you immediately. At first, it’s just a vague discomfort you can’t quite explain.
Time Efficiency Is a Delicate Subject
There’s another detail people rarely articulate out loud. Sending a voice message often saves the sender time by shifting the cost to the listener. It’s quicker to speak than to structure thoughts in writing. But listening requires more focus, attention, and energy.
On a subconscious level, this can feel like a mismatch in how time is valued. Not intentional, not rude — but noticeable. As if one person’s minute quietly became more important than the other’s.
Text Is Transparent. Voice Is a Black Box
Text is clear. You glance at it and instantly know whether it’s urgent, important, or something that can wait.
A voice message is a black box. You have no idea what’s inside: a pressing issue or a five-minute stream of thoughts. That uncertainty is why people often postpone listening — not out of laziness, but because the brain doesn’t know whether the effort is justified.
Calls: The Most Intrusive Format of All
Phone calls take things one step further. You might be focused, deeply immersed in a task — and suddenly, the phone rings. No warning. No context.
Text allows you to choose the moment. A call demands immediate attention. Even when nothing is truly urgent. And that interruption isn’t always welcome.
Why Voice Messages Are More Mentally Draining Than They Seem
Ironically, people tend to think more clearly when they write. Voice messages, on the other hand, are often filled with pauses, filler words, background noise, and half-formed sentences.
The brain has to filter out the noise, spending energy not on understanding the message, but on cleaning the signal. Instead of simply receiving information and moving on.
This Isn’t Coldness — It’s a Thinking Style
Psychologists note: this reaction is common among people with structured and systems-oriented thinking. It’s not social anxiety and not emotional detachment. It’s a desire to manage incoming information, rather than constantly reacting to it.
It’s no coincidence that similar observations have appeared in materials from menscult.net — the topic resonated with many who value focus, clarity, and intentional communication.
One Last Clarification
If I don’t respond to voice messages, it’s not a sign of ignoring you. And it’s not about self-importance. My brain simply works better with text.
Write it down — and chances are you’ll get a faster response. Calm, thoughtful, and to the point.
Why do some people dislike voice messages? Because they slow down information processing and require more cognitive effort.
Why is text communication more efficient? Text allows quick evaluation of importance and can be read at a convenient time.
Is this a sign of arrogance? No. It’s usually linked to structured thinking and attention management.
What’s the most effective way to communicate? Text for most situations; voice messages and calls only when truly necessary.
